Some men seem to be extremely lucky in hooking up. They get girls easily. If you are in between relationships or not ready for something serious, you probably still want to enjoy some physical connection. If it doesn’t come as easily to you as some of the other guys out there, it could be frustrating. Don’t go home alone every night any more. Instead, learn how to find hookups and enjoy yourself. Here are 10 tips for finding hookups.
Be Upfront
You need to be upfront about your intentions right away when you meet a potential hookup. Explain what you want and why you aren’t looking for something more serious at this time. Explain that you are only interested in something fun and casual or “just friends”. This does not mean you need to be rude and use degrading language. Alternatively, you should approach the situation with some delicacy. Be kind when you describe the relationship you want. However, you don’t want to be too nice. It’s wrong to lead a woman on and make them think you are interested in something more serious. it could lead to hurt feelings and possibly crazy behavior. You may be sending the wrong signals if you constantly use terms of endearment, such as “babe”, if you talk about the future together, or if you talk every single day.
If you get the sense that the other person is more into you than you are into them, you may choose to look for another hookup. If someone is emotionally involved, the whole situation could get messy, whether you are upfront or not. It’s your responsibility to protect your hookup from hurt feelings, so let them go if you get the sense that they are going to end up crushed.
Ideally, you want to find somebody who is looking for the exact same thing as you. There are plenty of women out there who aren’t in a place to start a relationship, either. That doesn’t mean you won’t be able to possibly start something later when you both are ready. However, you should both have an understanding that might never happen. It’s okay to just be looking for a good time, you just need to be upfront about it.
It’s also okay to change your mind with time. If you do start to develop feelings, you should let the other person know. That way, you can move forward in the best way for both parties with everything on the table. Who knows? Your hookup may turn into something more serious, and that’s okay, too.
Get Consent
Consent is sexy. You want to ensure that you both want to be together in the same way. You should talk about your intentions with each other before going home. You can even make it fun by talking about what you are both comfortable with. For example, you can play “Never Have I Ever” or “Truth or Dare” to learn more about the things you want to know. You don’t want to think a certain sex act is appropriate if the other person isn’t comfortable, and these games can help give you a sense of what is okay. A quick conversation beforehand can help clear everything up so that you and your partner are on the same page.
It’s also important to remember that a person is not able to consent if under the influence. Be careful not to move forward if someone is too drunk. This can require some restraint, but it will be good in the long run since you will prove yourself as a respectful person. It will help you develop a long-term friendship with the hookup since they know they can trust you. Plus, you don’t want to end up in trouble if your partner wakes up and feels violated. Even a person who says they are into it while intoxicated may come to regret their decision, so be careful. This is not to say that you cannot enjoy a couple of cocktails with your potential partner. In fact, that can help break the ice. However, you should practice moderation.
Look in the Right Places
If you want to successfully find a hookup, you may not do well trying to pick up a girl at a church event or at the grocery store. Instead, you want to look at more appropriate places, such as a bar or a club.
People generally go to a bar or club for a good time. Many of the people will only be interested in hanging with friends, but there may also be people looking for a hookup as well. There are a number of ways to tell if someone is interested in finding someone for the night. Look for people who are alone and dressed well. You should also keep your eye open to see if anyone is showing you attention. You may find someone sneaking a glance at you or smiling at you. A person may also be facing you or move closer to you. Body language can be the first sign that someone is available and interested.
Another good place to find a hookup is at a hotel bar. Someone may be in from out of town. They are having a couple of drinks, and they are alone. Plus, they already have a hotel room to enjoy.
Be Confident
When you are ready to approach someone for a hookup, you need to greet the person with an air of confidence. It starts with the way you carry yourself when you walk over. Walk tall and with a smile or a casual expression on your face. You want to seem confident, but you also want to appear approachable, too. Create a fun introduction, but you want to avoid using a corny line. Many women will get turned off by the typical lines. Some introductions to consider include:
- Hey. I like your dress/purse/shoes.
- I just got a new promotion. Want to celebrate with me?
- Hey. What is the best drink here?
- Can I buy you a drink?
- Where do you like to go to brunch in the morning?
Even the most corny line can be effective when stated with confidence. While it might feel a bit lame at first, don’t be afraid to practice in the mirror before you go out. This will help you learn the proper inflection and facial expression for the moment. You should also be mindful when approaching someone in a large group. You need to address everyone in the group while singling out the girl you are interested in. A girl with her friends will be far more difficult to get away, so you should aim to talk to someone who is alone.
While you want to be confident, you don’t want to cross the line into arrogance. Arrogance can be a serious turnoff for many women. You want to act humble (even if bragging a little bit). Your accomplishments and abilities should come out naturally during the conversation. You also shouldn’t be afraid to compliment the woman instead of only talking about yourself. A confident man isn’t afraid to build a woman up a little bit.
Use technology
We live in a digital age where almost everyone has a miniature computer in their pocket. Use this technology to your advantage. Start by trying different dating apps. There are a number of dating apps where you can meet people from the comfort of your own home. You don’t have to worry about going to the right place or weeding through the different women. Some dating apps are even specifically designed for people looking for casual encounters. Just be wary of misleading apps that won’t deliver what they offer.
When you download an app, you need to create an effective profile. First, you should include numerous pictures that make you look good. The more pictures you put up, the more credibility it will give you. Make sure the pictures are recent and aren’t misleading. You also want to avoid group pictures that may make it unclear which person you are.
Next, you have to write out a detailed profile. You want the profile to give other users the sense of who you are without being too detailed. You need to leave a little bit of mystery and leave something to talk about when you match. This is also a great opportunity to clarify what you are interested in. Remember not to be rude, but you should be clear if you are only interested in short-term fun. You don’t need to go into detail right on your page, but you also don’t want to mislead anyone into thinking you were ready for something serious if you aren’t.
Get to Know Each Other
Many women associate intimacy with some sort of connection. They may not want to hookup if you don’t try to get to know them. For this reason, you should learn to be a good listener. Start by asking a lot of questions about her. What does she do for a living? How was her day? Who does she live with? Does she have any pets? What was their last relationship like? When she talks, be sure to listen and show interest. You don’t want to interrupt and tell your own stories until the appropriate timing. Don’t be afraid to approach topics of relationships and sex. If she mentions that she is looking for something serious, she might not be the best.
Many men think that this can backfire since it can make the woman think they are interested. However, that isn’t necessarily the case. You can tell the young lady up front your intentions while still showing interest in her. You can make a great, new friend. When things fizzle out, you will help ensure that you still have a cordial relationship after the fact.
You don’t want to just “hit it and quit it” with a girl, especially if the encounter was fun. When you develop a sincere friendship with your hookup, it will increase the likelihood that you continue hooking up with each other. This means you won’t have to constantly be on the hunt. For some women, it may take a couple of encounters before they feel comfortable enough to be with a guy, and that’s okay. Just be careful not to get stuck in the friend zone if that’s not the type of relationship you want.
On the topic of getting to know your partner, you want to get to know her physically as well. Learn what she likes in bed so that you can please her and have her coming back for more. You want to make it all about her in the bedroom. When she is pleasured, she’ll be more interested in pleasuring you.
Look Your Best
Women want to go home with someone who takes care of themselves. You should make a point to tend to your appearance before you head out. Shower, brush your hair, and wear nice clothes. This doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy a rugged look or facial hair. However, you want to keep up on personal hygiene and not shy away from demonstrating a sense of style. You can actually generate a lot of female attention by the way you dress, so dress mindfully. You can try to stand out with a showy outfit, or you can opt to go for a more subtle style. Don’t dress to be someone different than you really are. Be yourself. That will help you find a girl who is a good match.
Let’s say you finally do find a match and get the opportunity to bring her home. You also want to ensure your home is as clean as possible. Keep your place clean, so you won’t gross her out when she comes over. You should also be prepared with an extra toothbrush and maybe even some drinks. You want to be a good host if you expect her to spend the night and possibly come back.
Be Safe
Hooking up with a random person isn’t the safest activity. You need to go into it with a certain amount of caution. If talking to somebody online, talk for a period of time before actually going to meet them. You should also ask to be added on Facebook to verify that they are who they say they are. A real person will have numerous friends and pictures. You may also choose to Google their name to see if anything pops up.
Always meet in a public place for the first time. When you meet, use your instincts to determine if you feel comfortable with this person. Even if you do, you should be mindful of where your wallet and phone is at all times. You also want to be careful about the items in your home if yo do bring them back to your place.
Finally, you want to make sure you use a condom if you do engage in physical activity. Both of you are looking for hookups, so you don’t want to be reckless. Unprotected sex can lead to an STD or pregnancy. You probably don’t want to deal with any of those problems, and a condom is a very simple way to eliminate the possibility. You will feel more safe, and you won’t do something that could potentially ruin your life.
Have Fun!
The whole point of looking for a hookup is to have fun! This should be light-hearted and exciting, so let yourself enjoy it. You want to make sure you are enjoying yourself, and you connect with your partner physically. Release your inhibitions and get into it. This means you should find a partner who like to do fun things. Talk to your partner about possibly doing something you have never done before. You may be surprised about what she might want to try. A hookup situation is a great way to explore these areas.
You should also be sure to avoid any drama. Hookups should not come with the same emotional drama as a regular relationship. When it does start getting dramatic, it tells you that something is amiss. A hookup is not worth the fighting and tears, so you’ll want to stop it before things get too crazy.
It is perfectly fine if you are looking for something casual at the moment. It’s your life, and you want what you want. However, you may discover that finding a hookup is more difficult than you thought. Many women aren’t interested in a hookup situation. Even the ones who are interested in hookups may not like your approach. Remember to be upfront without being rude. You also want to develop some kind of relationship with the person, even if it is just as a friendship. Most of all, just have fun and enjoy yourself (as long as you stay safe).
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